It was no secret that I wanted to move. I've been talking about that forever, and last you all knew I had planned to end up some where in the greater Boston area. Well, that won't be happening. It's because of money. I had to buy the car. The stepfather situation has changed the outlook of my financial situation. There is absolutely no way that I can afford any rents in that area. So, I needed to embrace my other plan that is been in the back of my head for a very long time.
It's New Hampshire. I have always loved that state. Live free or die baby. Live free or die. The libertarian part of me cries out in excitement.
I want to be the sort of person that makes strawberry jam and cans it. Yeah, I said it. I might even want a gingham tablecloth or something. I want to have a fridge full of organic food and spend my evenings crocheting in the country and my weekends swimming or ice skating on a lake. I want to plop all my paints down on the ground and take in the landscape. I want to live in the land of maple sugaring. Now that I've learned to make bread, I want to never buy store bought again. That's what I want. I think I finally know what peace looks like.
But we all know that I take me with me wherever I go. So, it won't be a magical solution but it may be an opportunity to put something together that is truly mine. To make a choice, rather than have a choice made for me.
As usual the hardest part is patience. I want to go yesterday. And for once, I can afford to do this now instead of later. But I won't leave here until the remaining occupants find a way to pay the rent without me, or until we reach the end of our lease this next July 1st. Whichever comes first. I thought of every way I possibly could to live on my own in CT or Mass and I realize that being a slave to the rent being due would kill me eventually. That kind of stress takes its toll. I shouldn't have to pay a thousand a month plus utilities for some closet sized one bedroom. That shit just isn't cool. So, bring on the country.